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Privacy has new meaning today than it did two decades ago, at the early dawn of social media. Increasingly, our personal lives have become something of an open book. Influencers even profit from sharing these insights (though those are often more carefully crafted than off-the-cuff). In any case, there are ways to protect your privacy even in this digital age during a New Jersey divorce.
Divorce lawyers will often advise clients to keep internet posts, videos, or even messages about the divorce to an absolute minimum. Beyond that, you’ll want to ensure that your ex doesn’t have open access to your personal accounts, devices and exchanges. Finally, consider mediation over litigation, as those proceedings do not become public record.
Restrict What You Share – and To Whom
This may seem like obvious advice, but the more you share about what’s happening about the breakdown of your relationship and pending legal proceedings, the less privacy you’ll have a right to expect. Plus, you might inadvertently hurt your case.
As noted by the National Law Review, more than 80 percent of divorce lawyers glean evidence directly from social media to use in Court. These can include character attributes relevant to custody arrangements, hidden assets relevant to equitable distribution and alimony matters, and just general contradiction of oral testimonies. Even if you don’t have anything to hide, bad-mouthing your ex can come back to bite you – particularly in child custody disputes.
If your ex is using social media or other online platforms to denigrate or disparage you, don’t engage. Bring it to your lawyer, who may be able to address it with a cease and desist letter. Alternatively, your attorney may bring this evidence to the Court, which may have significant implications for your ex beyond a few likes and emojis.
Some general guidelines for social media:
Protect Your Information From Your Ex
You may not be especially concerned about your ex “spying” on you, but it’s nonetheless a good idea to take some basic steps to protect your privacy during the divorce process. These include:
Minimizing Public Records of the Proceedings
Divorce is a legal proceeding that is formalized in the public record. But that doesn’t mean you can’t minimize some of those details being public – if you’re careful about how you proceed.
We often advise consideration of mediation. This process allows you to resolve these deeply personal matters in a private proceeding with the help of only your attorney(s) and mediator. You retain more control of the process, and you ensure sensitive details of your marriage and split stay off the official Court record.
Alternatively, you can ask your attorney whether sealing your case file – fully or partially – is an option. Judges are not keen to seal public records without just cause. However, if you can establish that revealing certain private details may hurt your career or be counter to the best interests of your children, it’s possible the request will be granted.
Update Your Permission Forms
It’s common for spouses to be listed as one another’s emergency contact or authorized personnel on everything from school forms to workplace records to medical releases to bank records. You will need to take special steps to remove your spouse from these permissions. Check with your attorney if you are unsure which of these may be considered joint accounts.
By working with an experienced East Brunswick divorce lawyer, you can ultimately maintain your privacy while regaining your independence.
Contact our East Brunswick New Jersey Divorce Attorneys today at (732) 377-3367 to schedule an appointment.


