Being married to a narcissist isn’t easy, but getting a divorce from one can be even more difficult. However, it’s not impossible. There are many resources to help you survive the painful and complex process of divorcing a narcissist or someone with narcissistic traits so you can move forward with your life. Here are some steps you can take to make it through this challenging time.
Understanding Narcissism and Marriage
If you believe your spouse is a narcissist, it’s important to inform yourself about the disorder to better understand what you are dealing with. Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a mental condition that causes an individual to have an inflated sense of self-importance, the need for admiration and attention, trouble with their relationships, and lack empathy for others.
Narcissists have low self-esteem and do not take criticism well. While there is professional help for narcissists, they do not always seek treatment because they may not think there is anything wrong with them. People can also show narcissistic traits while not being diagnosed with NPD. In either case, it can have a significant toll on a marriage.
How to Divorce a Narcissist
Remember, you are not alone in coping with a narcissistic spouse. Many people everyday are faced with similar situations and struggling with how to deal. The following tips can help you and your family survive a divorce from a narcissist:
Develop Realistic Expectations
For people with narcissistic spouses, an amicable divorce isn’t likely. Mediation is possible, but it can be a difficult process to do calmly. Therefore, before you begin the process of divorcing a narcissist, consider what your goals are. What do you expect in terms of the division of assets and property? What about custody of your children? Keep this in mind as you begin speaking to your attorney so they can thoroughly understand your case and what your goals are.
Stay Calm
A narcissist isn’t someone who will back down from a fight. Although you might be upset and angry with your spouse, you must let go of your emotions during this time and follow a well-thought-out strategic plan. Narcissistic spouses will go after everything in a divorce, making the process even more complicated and overwhelming. You’ll need to keep your guard up and be prepared for whatever they may try to do.
Find a Strong Support System
When you are married to a narcissist, it can take a significant toll on your emotions. It’s important to have a support system in place before you take on the task of getting a divorce from a narcissistic spouse. Whether you turn to a family member or friend, it’s important that you can trust and rely on them to be there for you during this difficult journey. If your mental health is struggling during this time, a therapist is a great resource to have as well. By going through therapy, you can begin the healing process.
Set Firm Boundaries
Narcissists are experts at dominating and manipulating situations in their favor. Having clear boundaries is critical during the divorce process, especially if children are involved. For example, a narcissistic parent might try to get you to change the parenting plan to fit their schedule. However, you should always stick to your court-ordered custody arrangement. Once you start to compromise with your ex, they will likely begin to take advantage of the situation.
Contact Our New Jersey Divorce Attorneys Today
If you’re ready to end your marriage with a narcissist, Rozin | Golinder Law is here to help. We understand the serious implications of divorcing a narcissist. Our sympathetic New Jersey divorce lawyers can help you prepare for a contested divorce, and will work diligently to meet your specific legal needs. Our sympathetic New Jersey divorce attorneys will secure what’s important to you and work diligently to obtain the best results for you and your family.
Call Rozin | Golinder Law today at (732) 810-0034 to consult with our New Jersey divorce lawyers today.